Where do we go from here?

I remember there was once a young man who dreamed of making it big. Big in the things he had wanted to do. He held on to his belief that no thing is impossible. That all it takes to make it is determination, faith, and perseverance and hard work. He wanted to taste fame. He yearned to breathe in success. Fame and success became his motives as he continued on with his life.

He studied hard. He graduated with a Diploma. Got himself a steady job at 20 going on 21. Started a life independently from his parents as a grown working adult. Met someone whom he regarded as special. His life was almost complete for what it was back then.

Four years on, he pursued his study, all for a guarantee of a better and improved life. Two years he took a break from work to be a full time student. The sacrifice, in a way, for a scroll called Degree, Upon completion, he continued working with the same employer for some two years. Then he left to join another employer. For a better pay. Life must evolve, so he told himself. 

He was doing something totally new when he started at the new company. Something he never did before. Something that was not what he studied for his Degree. Yet he still took the job because that was what he asked for. He just realised then that that was what he wanted to do. The career he wanted to pursue. A job that was of his interest. He was ready to learn along the way. From the tasks he was assigned to do, and the abundance of books he could read. 

Nothing is impossible, he said.

Years passed and he improved his knowledge and skills at doing what he was doing. True enough, anything is possible. Determination and courage. Those are the keys. He was enjoying the friends he made, the company of people around him, the kind of high profile job he had. He might not be a celebrity, but he was known to many because of the nature of his job. In the midst of all those, he slipped away from his early intention to make it big. He was basking in own version of happiness. Friends, good times, enjoyment, some money, some recognition. 

Thirteen years seemed short. And by then, he already passed his prime having lived in this world for almost four decades. And then there was a calling. He looked back at all those years he left behind and thought if he really ever achieved anything. He started comparing himself with his former college mates, school mates, people in his life. 

It did not take long for him to realise that there was something he forgot to remember all those years. That he could have done so much more. So much more. Life is not just about having many people around you. Not only about being known to many people. Not merely about events and ceremonies. Life is about living. And living is not about people. It is about you and only you.

He left the company after 13 years not because he hated it, but because he wanted to explore the opportunities that lie before him. To see whether the grass is truly greener on the other side. 

It could be said that he left for a slightly better position and a slightly better pay. That was not wrong. But more than that, he wanted to do something he believed he was worth of doing. That self confidence was never deleted from his soul. Indeed, he did prove he was the right man for the job at the new organisation. Yet, he did not enjoy being there as much as he enjoyed being with the previous company. Was it because of the friends he has made for over 10 years there? Was it because it was more colourful life before? Or was it because by that time he was 20 years older than when he first started? All those possibilities are better be left alone.

Because he understands that one must lead a happy life. When the heart's not in it, there is no happiness. That he knows for sure. His tenure was therefore short lived. He moved out to move on.

Today, as he was looking out from the balcony of his tall apartment, he saw from atop the bustling road and thought that people must be busy with their lives. Just like him, they must all have dreams. He was not sure if they would hold on to their dream to make it a reality, or they would somehow forget about it along the way, just like him.

And as he was closing the door of his balcony, he reminded himself ~ No Regrets ~ for no one can turn back time. Instead, he found a consolation to himself that happiness is not about having the most, but it's about wanting the least, for happiness, is what matters.

Move forward and no looking back. The question is not of where did we not go then, but, where do we go from here.

The Journey, Uncertain.

I didn't realise that it has been over a year since I last posted anything here. Had I been too busy? Perhaps. Or too lazy? Probably. Or too occupied with other things? Maybe. All the possibilities that actually are just made up excuses for something we did or did not do. 

So what am I going to write this time, I ask myself. Truth is, I am writing a book and maybe that is why I am forgetting my dear blog here. I should not do this to it for RumahBilut is the one I can regard as my first public platform of putting all my words into print. Indeed, as I shape the future, I should not forget to preserve the past.

Perhaps if I continue writing something here, it is proof that I am not ignoring it. And so I shall. Just write and write. Many things have happened in the past one year and very recently. Many people, bloggers included, have been writing about the missing Malaysia Airlines plane MH 370 and so I shall not do the same. Suffice to say, I share the sorrow of this unexpected turn of event. Really unfortunate. What makes it even worse is that up to the time of writing, the loss remains a mystery. Many theories and assumptions have been suggested by many quarters. Conspiracy theory included. We try to find who the person or persons or party behind this event. We want to put the blame on someone. On the other hand, there is also the power of God, and that id He so wills, anything that seems impossible can be possible.

Questions questions questions. People can grow to be impatient when they have no answers to their questions. Yet we are only human. Life is such that the more we ask the more we don't have the answers, the more we know the more we don't know. I am certain on one thing that God is testing us. 

As the Islamic scholar, philosopher, theologian and logician Ibn Taimiyyah quoted: "A clamaity that makes you turn to Allah is better for you than a blessing which makes you forget the remembrance of Allah."

We have been through many happiness as well as sadness throughout our times. And so I realise that one must not be too happy when good befalls him, and not too sad when bad befalls him. Life itself is indeed a series of trials and test for each human being. Perhaps the only thing certain in our life is uncertainty, and that God is with us throughout the journey.